Q-nimbus
Active member
In navolging van Pprune leek het mij ook leuk om hier eens wat moppen te posten. Het hoeven niet per se moppen te zijn, als het maar grappig is.
Bij deze:
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University
of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so
"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the
Internet.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
at which they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it
will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls
are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in
the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more
than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because
Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.
He gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you",
and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that: since Hell has frozen over, it
follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a
divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh
my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
En nog een leuk log van een IRC chatsessie:
<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk
<DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first
<DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out
<DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh
<DeadMansHand> What'd he say when he woke up this morning?
<Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you?
<DeadMansHand> holy fuck.
<DeadMansHand> i fucking hope im wrong about what im thinking right now
<DeadMansHand> im fucking going back to the beach to make sure
<DeadMansHand> if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this
<Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep shit.
quit: (DeadMansHand)
<Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night you fuck. Ken's going to be worrying about this shit all day
<Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts
join: (PeteRepeat) ([email protected])
<PeteRepeat> fucking ken
<PeteRepeat> ken... that fucker buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot
<quiqsilver> pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you.
<PeteRepeat> oh fuck.
<PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything.
quit: (PeteRepeat)
<Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.
<Tyran> i can't beleive how perfect their timing was
Bij deze:
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University
of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so
"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the
Internet.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
at which they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it
will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls
are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in
the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more
than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because
Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.
He gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you",
and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that: since Hell has frozen over, it
follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a
divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh
my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"
En nog een leuk log van een IRC chatsessie:
<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk
<DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first
<DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out
<DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh
<DeadMansHand> What'd he say when he woke up this morning?
<Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you?
<DeadMansHand> holy fuck.
<DeadMansHand> i fucking hope im wrong about what im thinking right now
<DeadMansHand> im fucking going back to the beach to make sure
<DeadMansHand> if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this
<Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep shit.
quit: (DeadMansHand)
<Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night you fuck. Ken's going to be worrying about this shit all day
<Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts
join: (PeteRepeat) ([email protected])
<PeteRepeat> fucking ken
<PeteRepeat> ken... that fucker buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot
<quiqsilver> pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you.
<PeteRepeat> oh fuck.
<PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything.
quit: (PeteRepeat)
<Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.
<Tyran> i can't beleive how perfect their timing was